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After a long hiatus, I have once again received a prime piece of inexplicable nonsense in my spam folder.  With some careful copying and plain text conversion I have rendered it into a harmless yet intriguingly weird poem.

I hate spam, but it’s nice when you can use recycle it into ‘art’ – very green.

Spam Poem

lower avow agog maths
poem haggle pinto dingo!
dagger brooch
maths proem
puddle yawl put dance!
toss toss khan scrap!
hoary dangles today’s khan!
legal tother hern footer!
vouch egress.

scrap sadism shapen alert!
proem juicy footer maths!
terse paid tother abbess!
sultry hackee boh drat?
scrap proem
dalle virile planer schism
maths tendon
parish drag maths haggle?
avow filth.

abbess link laser
telly boh
entail virile
common furore juicy drag?
abbess pirn patio spur?
brooch shapen boh smug.

pinto amines today
legal link
smug si lower focal!
yawl dago juicy
footer paid potto si!
idly stable uptake
brooch amines alert tendon!
paid solar
drill paid damme put?
footer khan.

drat pinto regard proem?
winy argue spur tother!
egress virus parish shapen!
sweet spur
legal sweet sadism planer!
asthma braky
comity virile avow.
pant haggle terse.
sadism whack patio idly!
uptake drill trader.
diver bane parish regard!
metope khan drag regard!
emote lower lemon haggle.

scrap proem pirn avow?
metope idly idly egress.
planer sadism scrap.
riven riven hackee sadism.
vouch common.
maths tower yawl abbess?
metope damme pirn.
hackee parish tower.

legal joy hackee legal!
legal sadism
metope sleigh regard virus?
emote metope focal ennui
focal drag smug virus!
sultry tother proem
solar filth pirn egress?
abbess entail.

joy sinewy lemon haggle!
scrap drat terse
common sleigh sinewy dagger.
drat stable comity
pirn loss link smug
hern proem quid hoary
trader comity winy pant?
hern whack proem robin
joy quid regard pirn!

terse winy
filler sultry quid
breezy patio ennui idly?
pinto haggle uptake
terse paid camera quid!
puddle link planer
focal planer scrap winy.
argue put lory.

shapen winy lower
sultry diver
damme jocose
alert loss
idly sultry agog
infer argue drill pirn!
mute egress planer toss?
egress virile.

furore footer
hunch si dalle hern!
lemon lory agog joy
alert put entail furore
damme infer today schism?
paid abbess quid lory!
comity infer juicy
diver smug camera solar.

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Ancient Ostrich Worship

Ancient Ostrich Worship

Charles, Duke of Lorraine by blood, was known to have once been in love with an ostrich, that was said to have belonged to his cousin Louis, the one-time King of Toulouse.  Could this have been the same Louis who may have been the mysterious author of the Nine Laws of the Lords of Light?  It was at least an intriguing possibility.  And if Louis was indeed the real author then this might explain why Charles never appears in any verifiable document known to historians.  In that case, we reasoned, the ‘Lords of Light’ must clearly be a code-name for the Masons, whose secret symbol we believed to have been a monk riding an ostrich.

The pieces of the puzzle were beginning to fall into place, but their implications were so explosively staggering in their incredible magnitude that we remained hesitant and skeptical.  Surely, we argued, if a secret alternate society of ostrich-riding masons were truly behind everything significant in history then there would at least be some kind of evidence.  But that was where we were wrong.

On October 17 1978 (a date whose symbolic significance escaped us at the time) we received an anonymous phone call from a man referring to himself only as ‘The Ostrich’.  After telling us his code name he said one word – ‘Austria’ – then hung up.

This seemingly innocuous central European toponym hit all of us like a thunderbolt as we scrambled for the Britannica.  Could it be mere coincidence that the word ‘Ostrich’ has the same basic semantic structure as the word ‘Osterreich’ (the Austrian for Austria)? Or that this word could possibly be translated as ‘The Eastern Empire’ (i.e. the Austro-Hungarian/Holy Roman Empire)? Furthermore, is not the East well-known as the source of many an exotic mystery? And, is the ostrich in fact not symbolically congruent with the ‘mythical’ roc, or phoenix, the magical bird that is able to resurrect itslef from the ashes?  In fact, is it not at least possible that the ostrich is a thinly-veiled reference to Jesus, who is well-known to have spent his formative years in the East (-ost = Host/Holy Ghost) learning secret teachings?

So what lay in wait for us in Austria?  What enormous secret, too monumental to reveal was veiled beneath the vaults of Vienna?  We got on the next train from Paris and sat right at the front.

[So I’m reading The Holy Blood and the Holy Grail and the whole thing is like this.  Got to finish it though so I can at least say I’ve read it, rather than slag it off by hearsay, and it is quite entertaining].

A good debate is running on Matt Staggs’ site which he has also transferred to his guest spot on Ecstatic Days here. Naturally, I’ve plunged right in with some of my own pithy and insightful nuggets of wisdom.

Check it out and join in.

Futurismic directed me to this site that critiques SF criticism. It makes me giddy just thinking about it. Great title for a site, though, and it looks really interesting.  I hope it doesn’t really prove ‘fruitless’, I suppose the name is ironic.


I got this news off Jeff Vandermeer‘s superlative site. Now, according to the publisher, it seems that Vance himself will be writing a preface. Can’t wait.

I’m going to start including what I’m reading, love reading and plan to read on this site as it seems pertinent to the subject matter.

The illustration is by the ridiculously talented Tom Kidd. It really captures the ambience of baroque ruin, a rare quality.


I got this news off Jeff Vandermeer‘s superlative site. Now, according to the publisher, it seems that Vance himself will be writing a preface. Can’t wait.

I’m going to start including what I’m reading, love reading and plan to read on this site as it seems pertinent to the subject matter.

The illustration is by the ridiculously talented Tom Kidd. It really captures the ambience of baroque ruin, a rare quality.

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